I am a farm girl. Always have been. Up with the sunrise and down when the chores are done. I miss that lifestyle a lot being at college in a town that seems like a city to me but even here there is a great treasure in watching the sun rise up over God's creation on an early Friday morning. There is nothing in the world like cracking open my while sitting in the stairwell window watching the sunrise. It's a very special time of day for me. It completes my day. Wasn't always that way though.
I started off college in September with a pledge to be a better person and Christian. I can remember saying God make me who you want me to be, like it was God who made all my choices, who walked me to class, read my bible, sinned and loved and went through my life. Seems kind of like well DUH !!! Of course that's not up to God. It's up to me! At the time that seemed like a very reasonable request and for a while I was very dedicated but I soon grew bored and fell away. I wasn't going to bible studies, reading my bible and going to class because I wanted to. It was an obligation. I wasn't getting anything out of it and I was slipping away. I went to events had that " spiritual high" went back to my room and went right back to doing all the things that God was telling me I needed to not be doing.
Expedition and Urbana came and went and things changed little by little but it wasn't until I was reminded of my roots and how much I love both life on the farm and God that I decided to check my motives. I realized I had some work to do and once again I went to God but this time with a slightly different prayer. " God, I know that I can't do this alone. I am willing to put effort into our relationship but when it comes to daily tasks, I need a bit of help. I know that a weakness of mine, could you help me be accountable?" Woke up the next morning and I couldn't wait to crack open my bible to see what God would have to say. I went back to reading my devotional while the sun rose and what a difference it made on my entire day. I walked closer to God and with a little help from various sources (friends and Internet reminders) I grew and grew more disciplined and now I look forward to sunrises again. Yeah :) God is good. He answers prayer especially when it lines up with His will and our motives are pure!
