I have made so many incredible friends since I have come to school and in many ways I have grown and changed. especially since Expedition but I also realized that there are some things that need to be taken care of and here and now is the way I plan on doing that. Publicly so that nothing is hidden. I have grown very close to an awesome God. I have been thinking about all hes brought me through and this is what I have to say now looking back. I am just not right without him and I know that. he defines me. I cant picture me without him and I know I have sooo much to learn, I want someone to teach me all of that, someone to disciple me in that way, but I know I'm headed in the right direction. On the other hand none of this can go anywhere further until I truly finish what God started working on first two years ago and then again at Expedition.
To all those at Granville Assembly of God: I am truly sorry for the hurtful words and actions of the past. I know that I was in the wrong and although it was what, three years ago now I feel the need to apologize and ask forgiveness. It was a different time and a different place now. Please know that I am not the same person I used to be. So much has changed and the closer I come to God the more I see just how hurtful and really hateful what I did was. I am very Sorry...
To those at IVCF: Yes as much as God had changed me before I got here he has changed me a 1000 times more since being around you all. All that I have faced since being here has been legit, It has not been fun or easy but my past is not what you think. Yes i struggled with addiction after years of abuse but you don't have the whole story. I was also addicted to lying and that was far more serious than any other problem I had. Know what you know about me is true but I feel wrong by not giving you the whole story and by not being real about the extent to which different things played a role in me getting to where I am.
To those at Adirondack Experience and those I know mostly from my sophomore and junior years of highschool: Well you really don't know me at all. Pretty much all you know about me is untrue. I hope that you can find it in your hearts to forgive me but I also understand I seriously broke your trust and that what I said and what I have done warrants you never speaking to me again. My biggest fear has been that by apologizing to you I would end anything we have left and I didn't want to do that. At this point honesty is more important than that and you all deserve to know the truth and should you by some shred of grace still want to know the real me you will see just how different I am than the person that I created way back when.
I am soo sorry to all of you. All of you have something to be angry about. Some more than others but this is my way of saying openly and publicly so that nothing can be disputed that I am truly sorry for all my ways of the past. The hurtful sinful ways of the past. I hope you can all find it in your hearts to forgive, start new and move on. I know some of you already have but to those who have not, know this isn't easy and that I really am sorry for hurting you all like I have.
